Top 10 Bizarre Foods They Most Likely Serve in Hell

Top 10 Bizarre Foods They Most Likely Serve in Hell

August 17, 2019 100 By Bertrand Dibbert


Top 10 Bizarre Foods They Most Likely Serve
in Hell 10. Satan’s Ashes Curry Let me be very clear that I absolutely love
spicy food, but I also have this unwritten rule (carved into a huge boulder behind my
house) that I will never try anything that can only be described as tasting “like pain.” Speaking of which – Satan’s Ashes Curry.
Lauded as the world’s most spicy curry mixing the infamous Dorset Naga, Naga Morich and
Bhut Jolokia) peppers (the latter clocking in at over 1,000,000 Scoville units of hotness),
the dish might very well be renamed The Reverse Volcano Curry, if you catch my drift. According
to a man who actually managed to eat a plate of Satan’s Ashes Curry, the dish burns with
the power and hatred of 1000 suns—with whose wives you have slept—from the very first
bite with no intention of ever stopping. It’s little surprise that the same man later
confessed to almost passing out from the pain while on the toilet. 9. St. Elmo Steak House’s Shrimp Cocktail We aren’t done with colon-annihilating dishes
yet, but who would have thought that the next contender for the title of hottest food ever
would come from INDIANA of all places? Well, it has. The St. Elmo Steak House’s shrimp
cocktail has been called the spiciest dish in the world, a feat all the more impressive
considering that it doesn’t use a single pepper. Its cause is helped by being made more from
horseradish than actual shrimps. Twenty pounds of fresh grated horseradish to be exact, enough
to propel a typical human being to Mach 30 by causing fire to shoot out of every orifice
in your body. I’m hearing that the Pentagon is looking into the possibility of weaponizing
the dish, but is meeting opposition from people quoting the Geneva Convention. 8. Monkey Brain To this day there is no conclusive evidence
if monkey brain was ever a real food anywhere in the world but…well, yeah, of course it
was. How hard it would be to kill a monkey and eat its brain? I can say with 100% certainty
that somewhere, at some point in history, someone took a monkey and ate its brain. Whether
that person had black, dead eyes and could only speak in “screams of cursed toddlers”
is up for debate, but the point is that the dish definitely does exist. I should probably just put it out there that,
if you are ever offered monkey brain, it would probably be wise to refuse it. Not because
it’s gross and wrong, even though it is, but because it might unfortunately lead to
Mad Monkey Disease, which to my total surprise is apparently a real thing. 7. Ikizukuri Ikizukuri comes from Japan. That’s really
all the explanation you need for the horrors that follow: At its core, Ikizukuri is simply raw fish.
Even the name literally means “prepared alive.” But unlike sashimi, Ikizukuri requires
the chef to cut up the fish and serve you its soft, butchered body parts while the fish
is still alive. On your plate! No, seriously, the dish is actually an alive, slowly dying
fish (with its eyes moving and its gills grasping for air), surrounded by its sliced flesh.
On your plate. I feel like I can’t emphasize that point enough. One Japanese restaurant even offers to cut
up the fish and serve you its meat in such a way that will leave the fish alive for hours.
And to prove it, they will put it in the tank and let it swim with ONE SIDE OF ITS SKELETON
COMPLETELY EXPOSED. You can watch it in the video in the source
but…don’t say I didn’t warn you. 6. Heart Attack Grill’s Quadruple Bypass
Burger The Heart Attack Grill restaurant is the only
reason aliens will ever need to wipe us off the face of the planet. A restaurant openly
promoting how unhealthy its menu is (and it is, considering that some of their food is
fried in pure lard) would be like Toyota rolling out a car named “The Head-on Collision.” Among HAG’s menu items which give me small
chest pains just by looking at them, a single monstrosity stands out: the Quadruple Bypass
Burger. Four thick 0.5 pound patties, bacon and cheese, so tall that even a python would
break its jaw on it. And, in what I assume was a risky but bold promotional stunt, one
of the restaurant’s customers decided to prove that the burger’s name isn’t just
for show by actually getting a heart attack while eating the damned thing. Oh sorry, that’s wrong. The customer who
got the heart attack was only eating a TRIPLE Bypass Burger. Whew, good to know that the
Quadruple one is still safe. 5. Casu Marzu Cheese is a wonderful invention when you think
about it. Basically, it’s milk fermented to a degree that causes it to become delicious
(more so when sliced and placed on a hamburger), but not enough to make it unfit for human
consumption. The Casu Marzu cheese, on the other hand, laughs at such limitations even
though it really, really shouldn’t. Casu Marzu is a soft, putrid, totally-decomposed-from-where-I-am-standing
cheese that is the final product of cheese fly larvae activity. Yes, the cheese is made
by letting a bunch of flies have sex and birth their disgusting babies inside it. And then
people want to eat it. Unsurprisingly, the cheese is banned almost
everywhere in the world, but you have to wonder. What place on Earth values their and other
people’s lives so little to produce a thing like Casu Marzu? What nation would be this
hardcore? Is it some small village in Siberia populated only be ex-Spetsnaz soldiers, or
maybe an entirely new breed of humans which emerged from the volcanic bellows of Hawaii? What? It’s from Sardinia? No, that can’t
be right. Huh…mental note: never, EVER piss off a Sardinian. 4. Century Egg Since we are already on the topic of cheese,
it’s good to mention that many other foods acquire a richer taste as they age. Wine would
be a good example. But very rarely on a list of such foods would you ever find eggs…unless
you’re in China. Say hello to the Chinese century egg, made
by preserving it in a husk of clay, ash or lime for several weeks or even months. This
process breaks down some of the compounds of the egg and pickles it from the inside
out in a very unique way, also turning it greenish-black. The process is actually quite
sophisticated, as it ferments the eggs but does not spoil it, which is of course akin
to praising someone for skillfully learning to drive a car using only their chest hair. According to some account, the century egg
is so pungent that the smell alone could knock out an 18th century dung farmer. 3. Balut If you want to see pictures of this abomination
(which are sad beyond belief), you’ll have to click the source below. For the sake of
this article’s sanity, however, we’ll stick with fluffy bunny rabbits. Now then. We’re still in the domain of weird
eggs, this one coming from the Philippines. The recipe for Balut is as simple as it is
cruel and insane. First, you take a standard fertilized duck egg, then you let the little
baby duck inside grow safely in the shell, all tra-la-la-dee without a care in the world.
Then, when the fetus is sorta formed but not completely, you boil the “egg” alive and
eat it because to Hell with ducks, that’s why! What’s this feeling when you want to
both cry and throw up in your mouth at the same time? Someone should really invent a
name for it, like “cromit” (cry + vomit) or weerl (weep + hurl). 2. Raw Blood Soup Did I say that the recipe for Balut was simple?
Well it has nothing on the traditional Vietnamese dish of Tiet Canh. Check it out: take duck
blood, add duck meat plus spices, then eat. Alright, alright, the actual process is sometimes
more complicated than that but, once your main ingredient is raw blood, all the other
stuff about the dish kinda stops being important. On the other hand, forcing your significant
other to sit down to a plateful of Tiet Canh might finally get them a) off that whole Twilight
craze, and b) to give you that divorce you wanted. 1. Bats As with Balut, TopTenz wishes to save you
thousands of dollars on therapy bills by not showing any actual pictures. Instead, you
get Batman. So, apparently some people in Asia, especially
in one village in Thailand, like to eat bats. Guys, really; if you want to commit suicide
this much, there are easier ways than trying to make Ol’ Bats up here break his no-killing
cardinal rule for you. The Thai Bat is prepared thusly: first you
kill the bats by plunging them into boiling water while alive. Then the bats are skinned,
grilled and chopped up into a fine paste with herbs, though they can very well be eaten
whole. For a more visual and way more traumatizing look at eating bats, check out the video in
the source. Then go find a fun new hobby to fill those late-night hours which you used
to pass with wonderful, blissful sleep.